You just click with some people right away—and others you just want to keep right away from. Why is that?

You’ve only just met someone, and within the first three seconds, you have made all sorts of decisions about him or her and how much you want him or her in your life—or not.

Broadly speaking, we like the people who are like us and dislike the people who are different from us to the degree of sameness or difference. The things we have in common bring us together. For example, at a tennis club or meditation group, it’s the thing that everyone has in common that brings them together—tennis or meditation.

The things that are different about us are the things that tear us apart (e.g., religion, skin coloUr, or political alliance). What you see as the same or different simply depends on your values and what you see as important.